It was still there. Nicole let go of the breath she had been holding during that flash moment when she wasn't sure if the ring was still there or not.
It wasnt just that the ring was one of the most important, irreplaceable items she owned - and one of the only things she had from her grandmother. It was something more. Likeshe had lived this night before.... and in that version, she had lost the ring. Nothing else from the night echoed as familiar, just the gnawing sense that her ring was important.
That if she didnt make it through the night with it, that she would have failed.
This had happened before - the feeling that whatever she was experiencing wasn't new, and that there was something about this particular time that needed to be a certain way for it - whatever IT was - to be a success. Sometimes it was just a feeling - like knowing that when Tom Brady tosses the superbowl trophy from one yacht to another - if that pass was incomplete it indicated destruction.
Not that that actually happened, of course - the pass was, as expected, complete and the trophy didn't take a swim.
And Nicole still had her ring. That was a good thing, right? It had to be - the anxiety clenching her lungs, that felt like an elephant was sitting on her chest with each breath - that wasn't normal 'oh I hope I don't lose it' stuff. She wore her grandmothers ring often, if not daily. So why was this night different? And how did she know that all she had to do was make it through with her ring and they (they?! where did that come from? she was just her, Nicole.) they could move on.
She couldnt think about it too hard - it was making her head hurt. That was not what she wanted. It was a night out with her friends, a night where she was out to enjoy herself and not be too scared, too introverted, to socially anxious to go out and have the type of fun she saw other people living on social media. She was going to have that kind of night, and not fight through a headache or even have to leave early because of it.
No, she would make sure she had her ring and let the night and the party continue.
As long as she had her ring. Which she did. This was getting stressful. Nicole gently played with her ring, flagged down their server, and ordered a round of shots for the table. That would help her stop thinking, stop obsessing, right?
And the ring was still there.
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